Life Update + CCGRWM + Ways to Help | @ohjaechaos

Before we get into it, I want to tell you that I will be talking about some not so fun stuff, like depression, panic attacks, and some sucky adult stuff. So if you’re not into that sort of thing – feel free to skip this post.

Preface: I filmed this CCGRWM back in July, and I forgot to share this video (and any extra thoughts that I had) on here… Spoonie Brain, FTW! I wanted to update you on some things and keep everyone in on what’s been going on with my Chaos-filled life.

Let me break this down in chunks:

Depression & Panic Attacks:

Depression is something that I have struggled off and on with since I was a teenager. I’ve always referred to depression as stupid brain gnargles in the past… and it’s one of the ways I can visualize and cope with that aspect of my mental illness. This year has by far been one of the toughest years dealing with it. I know that stress and spoonie life aggravates it greatly and the last several months have definitely had a heaping helping of both.

I know that things will get better… but in the meantime, I will keep on keeping on and roll as best as I can with the punches.

It’s still an uphill battle. Some days are better than others, but over the course of this month – I’ve had 18 separate panic attacks and the month isn’t even over. Panic attacks are no friggin joke and come on with no trigger for the most part. I have literally been minding my own business in a grocery store and one started. WTF?!

I am trying to take as much care of my self as possible and I’ll be the first one to admit to not being the best at taking care of myself. Additionally, I’ve been trying to work more adaptogenic herbs like CBD, reishi, and ashwagandha powder in my diet (to potentially help with mood control, easing stress, and calming panic attacks). Those aren’t miracle cures and do take a while to build up in your system, so the jury is still out if I notice a glaring, positive difference. Also, I’ve been making an effort to exercise and do yoga more when I have the extra spoons, along with meditating and remembering to breathe as much as possible and journaling more.

I do better on days where I stay busy and can stay focused on tasks, aka taking my brain off and out of a depression spiral, like #13DoH2k19 content! Crafting has always been a hobby and it’s one of the aspects of my content creator life that I love. Focusing on positive things, like Halloween, family dinners with my Mom and Aunt, spending quality time with my little Chaos family, puppy snuggles, and cooking…

It’s easy to get sucked into the storm when everything seems to close in and swirl, claustrophobically, around you… but having little bright moments (like fireflies) to focus on help. For example, and this may be ridiculously silly, but I am a person who does better as a whole when there are a lot of windows and natural light around. To help me remember the bright, little things that I am thankful in my life I have hung up a few little light-catching prisms on a few of the sunnier windows. Seeing those little rainbows bouncing around my room makes me smile… and it’s just light bending in a certain way to produce various wavelengths of color… but it is something positive and that’s what I need.

If you are dealing with depression or any other mental health issues, please reach out and speak with someone – like an impartial third party or friend…
and know that mental illness is NOT a sign of weakness.
You are worth it. You mean more than you know to the people around you.

Mr. Chaos and the Job Status:

The opportunity that I mentioned in the CCGRWM fell through on the part of the company. They basically were told by those higher up in the food chain that they didn’t feel like they should hire anyone at the moment, regardless of being severely understaffed and dragging my amazing partner-in-crime along for almost three fucking months. I’m still pissed about it. It was a massive blow because we were just waiting on the hiring to be approved. That’s how far along in the process he was… but since nothing was in writing, there isn’t anything that could be done.

I have to give it to Mr. Chaos. He is a friggin’ champ and while that was a massive gut punch, and with unemployment running out, he is still putting his best foot forward. He’s still applying for jobs and we are waiting to hear back from a few opportunities. I’m biased, but he is very skilled at what he does. Finding a job that matches his degree of skill is part of the reason why it is taking longer than both of us would like. Something will come up on the job front. It has to. In the meantime, things are very, very, very tight but thankfully we have been able to get the bills covered and food on the table with the help of some family members – at least for the next month or so.

So, if you pray, send positive juju, good vibrations, or think happy thoughts, I would greatly appreciate a little being sent our way. We need all of the good thoughts that we can right now. I’m not one to ask for help, but I’m having to eat a big ole’ helping of humility pie.

What I’m doing to help as much as possible:

For those that aren’t fully aware, I am chronically ill. I have multiple chronic illnesses (including SLE, fibromyalgia, POTS, migraines, etc…) that restrict me from being able to hold a regular 9 to 5. I am disabled. It drives me bonkers, especially right now with everything going on, that I cannot do more but my body physically does not allow me to work like a normal, healthy person. I do what I can when I have the energy (ie: spoons) to do so.

My goal is to amp up my content online to at least try and bring a little something back to the household. A big part of that is this year’s #13DoH content. Maybe if I knock it out of the park, people will notice and I can get to the threshold on YouTube where I can actually start monetizing my videos… not like they’re be “advertiser-friendly” give YouTube’s strict guidelines and algorithms, but it’s worth a shot. October is always my biggest month as far as metrics go and I’m trying to cultivate and grow that as much as possible – hence why I am trying to make #13DoH better than years past.

If you’d like to get a taste for the looks that I’ve created for the 13 Days of Halloween in years past, then check out the playlist I’ve created and embedded below:

I would love to be able to do sponsored posts that actually pay anything more than “exposure bucks” but given that I am a tiny content creator that has been somewhat sporadic on posting, brands aren’t too keen on my particular brand. I’m trying to be better at posting more consistently and will still post the same level of quality that I have strived for since starting this crazy thing. I’m a semi-perfectionist when it comes to digital content and will work until it’s up to my level of awesome before I publish it on the internet if that makes any sense.

Patreon is the biggest source of something, albeit not much (but it’s enough for gas and a trip to the grocery store), that I’ve been able to bring into our household. I am so appreciative and indebted to the kindness and generosity of my amazing Patrons. I will never take their support for granted and I am hopefully making it worth their while. Patrons, seriously… thank you.

If you would like to see more behind-the-scenes content, exclusive content; like tutorials, snail mail, blooper reels, a one-of-a-kind Discord community and more – and can afford to become a member of our Patreon community, I would greatly appreciate your patronage and support.

Once Halloween is over, I am tossing around the idea of opening up an online store for prints, trinkets, commissioned doodles, and possibly digital assets for graphic designers/photographers. I’ve had success with Etsy in the past but it’s been a few years. I am creative and talented … and a bit of a craft supply fiend, so I have the tools – I just need to make sure that it would be viable for me to venture into that world… check back with me after Halloween if my craftables sound interesting.

The next section is focused on the ways YOU can help.
Please don’t take this as begging or whining just to get money. I hate, [see: HATE WITH A FIERY PASSION OF A BILLION SUNS], asking for help but right now – things are very tight and I wouldn’t ask if it weren’t absolutely necessary. Some options are like Patreon and Ko-Fi, which are monetary ways that go directly to me, others are affiliate links, and lastly (and least expensive, because it’s free) is to share my work – if you enjoy it.

Monetary Aid:

• Patreon: As mentioned above, Patreon is like a subscription service to your favorite little Chaos. The Patreon community gets perks that vary depending on what tier you choose to support. 95% off all the pledges go directly to me, Patreon does take a tiny cut – which sucks, but it is what it is.
  https://www.patreon.com/ohjaechaos/
  
• Ko-Fi: I’ve talked about Ko-Fi before, last year around this time to be exact. Think of this platform like an internet tip jar. You can give “coffees” to help support your favorite creators. I’ve set up my account so each “coffee” is $3USD. You can give as many coffees as you’d like and all of the Ko-Fi money I collect from August until Nov. 1st go towards bettering my #13DoH content.
  https://ko-fi.com/ohjaechaos

Affiliate Codes:

Listed below are the sites that I have affiliate codes with. Using my affiliate codes do not cost any extra money, and in fact, most save you a percentage off your total purchase cost. The only exception to that is my Amazon referral link, which I do make a tiny commission off of.

• JORDANDENE: JordanDene is a fantastic nerdy wearable and lifestyle brand that I have been supporting for YEARS! A few months ago, I was asked to join their community of ambassadors and I said YES because they are a brand that I truly stand behind and support. You can use my code “ohjaechaos” at checkout to save 15% on purchases of $20 or more. https://jordandene.com/discount/ohjaechaos
  
• ESPIONAGE COSMETICS: Espionage was the first brand to notice and connect with me when I first started as a baby little content creator back in 2014. They are a group of amazing and nerdy folk and I am thankful to call them my Nerd Makeup Familia. You can use my code “NMA15CHAOS” to save 15% on purchases of $25 or more. Some exclusions apply. FOLLOW THIS LINK TO GO TO THEIR WEBSITE.
  
•  MISFITS MARKET: Love Veggies? Get your love on for ugly produce with Misfit Market. They are a Philadelphia based company that is working with local farmers to reduce the amount of food waste that goes into landfills. I love their program and think that you might too. Each week they feature different organic produce and include recipes. If you are in Pennsylvania, New York, New Jersey, Connecticut, Delaware, Massachusetts, Vermont, New Hampshire, Rhode Island, Maine, Ohio, West Virginia, Washington, D.C., Virginia, or Maryland I highly recommend checking them out. If you want to get 30% off your first box, just use my referral link: http://misfitsmarket.refr.cc/ohjaechaos
  
• Amazon Associates: For the few issues that I have with Amazon as a company (their business practices and the way they treat their employees are dismal)… but they are a useful resource. If you see an Amazon link on any of my posts – it is a referral link and I do make a tiny commission on each purchase. If you would like to help me out while grabbing some stuff on Amazon, please bookmark and use this link: Amazon Main Page – ohjaechaos
  

The most important way you can help me is by sharing and continuing to support my work, online. It is free and only takes a second to comment, like, or share one of my posts with your friends.

In order to continue doing what I’m doing online, whatever that may be, I rely on your interactions. Social media platforms are making it harder and harder to interact with you on my end, with all of the algorithms and shadow bans and oversaturation of everything else. I want to know that you are enjoying what I’m putting out there or if there’s something you’d like to see – please tell me and maybe I can make that request come true.

Ways to help me out online:

• Follow me on your favorite social platforms (you can find me by searching for ohjaechaos).
  
• Subscribe to my Youtube channel and turn on the notification bell.
  
• Subscribe here to my blog – just join by signing up with your email or WordPress account that way you are the first to know when new posts go live. There is a signup box on the sidebar on the right-hand side of this screen. I don’t think people remember that I have a blog, but it is something that I am proud of and it’s my little corner of the internet where I don’t have to compete with algorithms or large companies trying to make me buy sponsored links so more than 5% of my followers will see my posts.
  
• If you like my content and don’t see it, regularly, on IG without having to hunt it down, spend a few minutes going through and liking and commenting on my most recent posts – this tells the algorithm that you do want to see my content and it should start showing up in your feed more often. The same goes with YouTube videos. The more engaged you are on posts or videos, the more likely they will show up in your feed in the future… also, I love interacting with you guys.

I know this sounds like a lot, and it is one big brain dump on my end – but I am terrible at asking for help, so this is my attempt at doing so. If you want to help AND can throw a couple of coppers my way that would be awesome. If you want to help and can’t afford to spare any, THAT IS OKAY AND I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND, I would love to have your continued online support and interaction! Life happens and I am well versed in how tight things can be.

And now… back to the makeup details in my CCGRWM:

I guess that’s it for now. Congrats if you made it down to the bottom of the post without falling asleep… I know it was a bit of a struggle at times. 😉 Anyways, I’m going to hop off here and get back to working on content for my Patreon patrons AND the #13DoH2k19!

Stay tuned for my current favorites & fails video and post dropping on Friday!
And if I don’t talk at you before then, have a fantastic Labor Day weekend – have lots of fun and stay safe.